


What Will Your Pleasure Be

by BlackEyedGirl



Category: Haven - Fandom
Genre: Case Fic, Fade to Black, Kissing, Multi, Season/Series 03 Spoilers, Threesome - F/M/M, Works by Magic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-05
Updated: 2013-09-05
Packaged: 2017-12-25 16:36:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/955359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackEyedGirl/pseuds/BlackEyedGirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It starts with the clocks, and progresses pretty rapidly from there. Audrey wants to connect the dots, and in the meantime Duke and Nathan are pretending they don't know what they want. [Post S3, no S4 spoilers.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Will Your Pleasure Be

**Author's Note:**

  * For [the_wanlorn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_wanlorn/gifts).



> Aimed at the part of the request that asked for cracky things treated semi-seriously, with a few other elements dragged in.  
> No S4 spoilers, because I do not know any.
> 
> There is a **content note** , not for any of the archive warnings, in the endnote.

Audrey lets Nathan get the radio, because she’s pretty certain that Laverne’s call is aimed at him. “Honey?”

He picks up. “Yeah, Laverne.”

“Weird one.”

Nathan turns to smile at Audrey, just the corner of his mouth turning up. This is their first ‘normal’ case since she’s been back, so of course it opens with weird. Audrey doesn’t think she would have it any other way. Nathan asks, “How weird?”

“We’re getting a lot of reports about clocks stopping.”

Nathan looks down at the radio for a second. “... clocks stopping,” he says.

“That’s what I’m hearing,” Laverne answers.

“I’m not sure that’s our responsibility.” Nathan keeps his tone level.

“You should see these clocks.”

And because this is Haven, and this town has never been content with just a little bit of oddness, they end up in a ground floor office, staring at the wall clock. The minute hand is vibrating, refusing to move from one-minute-to to twelve, and so ultimately unable to get to nine a.m. Nathan takes it off the wall, looking at the back. “Any chance at all this is about the battery?”

Audrey leans over the desk to look at the computer. The nine of eight fifty-nine is flickering. “I’m guessing no.”

“I’m saying, my watch is working fine.” Nathan taps it, just to be sure, but Audrey doesn’t disagree. Her own watch, the clock in the truck, the chimes on the church tower – it’s past nine by a way now.

She says, “All the reports are from around this area. We weren’t here when it started?” She’s mostly just thinking out loud, the way she has with him a hundred times. Audrey doesn’t remember the length of time away exactly. She doesn’t remember any version of her that had something to compare this to – how it would feel for a normal relationship to be broken and put back together the way hers have been. The echo of the healing ache is with her all the same – what it is to be back with someone you had missed long and deeply, the world returned to tune. She says, “Or we weren’t the target and the office was?”

“Reports start all the way down the street,” Nathan says. “Far back as the square, at least.”

They’re interrupted by a door slamming open. A man runs in to the office. He’s got a stain on the front of his shirt and he’s sweating. “I’m sorry I’m late, the baby’s sick and there was this-.” He looks at the clock, and then down at his own watch. “What time is it?”

“Good question,” Nathan says.

Both of their phones beep. Audrey reads the message. “Snowstorm?”

“Snowstorm just over one street is weird even for Maine,” Nathan says.

“Weirder than the clocks?”

“Until time actually _stops_ , yeah.”

Audrey concedes that point, and weather Troubles have definitely caused problems for them before, although so have Troubles that didn’t seem initially catastrophic. 

Still, they head out to investigate where a snowstorm has indeed thrown out a winter-wonderland over Evans Street. The kids are out making snowmen in the biggest garden and conducting an epic snowball fight between at least four teams. One of the boys slips and falls, grazing his knee. His lip quivers, threatening to start crying, and of course Nathan heads over the road to pick him up. There’s a woman already there, pulling the boy to his feet. She kisses her fingertips and then presses them to his knee. Nathan smiles at her. “Morning, Ellen.”

“Hi, Nathan. Some weather, huh?”

“You and the kids okay?”

“Oh, sure. The centre was supposed to be closed today – they were supposed to be painting, you remember? But with all this snow what can they do? Peter asked if I minded coming in, since a few of the kids turned up anyway and I’m just down the street. I guess they heard about the snow.”

“I don’t blame them,” Nathan says. “With snow like this. But you haven’t seen anything else strange around here? Other than the weather?”

She shakes her head. “At least it’s not doing any harm. Michael, don’t you dare-! Excuse me.” She heads into the middle of the children.

Audrey catches Nathan’s eyes before he can start going gooey over the kids. She asks, “It’s a youth centre, behind the church, right? Isn’t this near where the clock thing started?”

Nathan consults his notes. “Close enough.”

“You think there’s a connection?”

He rolls one shoulder up in a shrug. “I guess that’s the question.” The phone beeps again. “Okay, now I’ve got people trapped in the library because the _doors_ have disappeared.”

“Magically appearing cars?” Audrey counters.

“Sorry?”

“Like it dropped out of the sky without dinging the paintwork.”

“Anyone hurt?”

“Not yet. How does one Trouble do this?” Audrey asks.

Nathan bumps her arm, light enough that she barely feels it. “We’ll figure it out.”

 

* * *

The trail of weird, as trails of weird often do, leads to the Gull eventually. Audrey will not deny that she was hoping for that, just a little. Duke hasn’t recovered his normal level of equanimity with the two of them. He hasn’t been avoiding them, exactly, and she’s no longer sure whether he used to seek them out more or if they just had other problems throwing them together. The past few weeks, life has been as normal as life in Haven gets, and Audrey has barely seen Duke except to say hello to him as she’s running up the steps to her apartment. 

Nathan calls, “Duke?”

Duke appears from the back. “If it’s about the fish, I don’t know anything. Or the mermaids, honestly. Merpeople?”

Nathan asks. “What fish?”

Audrey says, “Fish swimming into nets out in the harbour.” She’s just picked up that message. There are officers down there already.

“Yeah?” Nathan asks. “Missed that one.”

“It’s outside the radius. Though the clocks have started again. Maybe they’re on the move.”

Duke looks between the two of them. “Do I want to know, or should I just call this a regular day in Haven?”

“Regular enough,” Audrey says. “Duke, we had a- mermaids, seriously?”

He shakes his head. “I didn’t see anything. All I know, Cindy was out on the deck with her kids and then there was a lot of shrieking. Some of the customers ran outside, by the time I got there, nothing. Maybe I saw something flashing in the water, but...”

Audrey ticks them off. “So we have clocks stuck in time, freak weather, freak animal behaviour, things appearing and disappearing, and possible mythological creatures.” She looks at Nathan. “Dreams again?” 

“God, I hope not.”

“Yeah.” Audrey rests her hand on his arm. “Nightmares come to life is the last thing we need right now.” Her own, particularly, aren’t something she wants to see living and breathing in their town.

Nathan’s gaze drops to her hand, still on his arm. Duke’s eyes follow Nathan’s. Nathan says, “We need to find out who’s been in all these places.” He turns to Duke. “You can get us a list?”

Duke shakes his head, though it doesn’t look much like a no. He says, “You expect me to remember everyone who’s been in here today?”

“Duke.”

Duke breaks eye contact with Nathan first. He holds out his hand. “Pen. Paper.”

Nathan passes them over, closing Duke’s hand around the pen. “Thanks.”

Duke sighs. “Amazing I get any business in here at all, with you two always prowling around.”

“You trying to get us to leave?” Audrey asks.

She wonders, sometimes, how Duke manages in his other line of business. He gives away so much with his face. So the other thing she wonders is how Nathan, with thirty years of knowing Duke and a cop brain, still gives Duke a long stare like he can’t see the answer to the question all over him. 

Duke ignores the scrutiny and finishes his list. “There. Cindy’s still around somewhere if you want to ask her what she remembers. We had a few of the regulars, some people in for coffee or lunch. Teagues were about, so if you want to get on top of the mermaid story...” 

Nathan takes the page and nods. “Thanks.”

“Yeah, sure.” Duke heads behind the bar. “See you later, I’ll be on the Rouge.”

Nathan watches him go. “Did we say we’d be around...?”

Life is either way too short or way too long for this. Audrey knows this now, but she also knows they have a job to do. “Later. We’ll come back later.” 

 

* * *

The guy with the appearing sports car is now in hospital because it disappeared while he was driving it. Audrey is still trying to get her head around the idea of getting into a car just because it appeared on the road and the keys landed in your pocket. Apparently it was a red Chevy and he had wanted one since he was fifteen. 

The doors are back at the library, although honestly no one inside had seemed in any particular hurry to leave. The fish, bizarrely, have yet to disappear. 

“You think it’s because the fish were smaller?” Nathan asks.

“Yeah, but there were more of them. I guess by volume there was more snow than fish, though that’s still there too. What the hell is this?”

Nathan doesn’t answer, distracted by a parking space opening up just where they need to be. Then he’s distracted by the car which just left the space pulling a U-turn and blasting the horn at him. Nathan leans out of the window and the guy must recognise ‘cop’ because he peels off pretty sharply after that. 

They get out of the truck and survey the scene. Nathan asks, “Where do you think flying falls on the list?” The teenage girls are holding hands in the air, swooping down to buzz the guy back at street-level looking like he doesn’t know whether to yell or ask to join them.

“If that wears off when they’re in the air...” Audrey says.

“Yeah,” Nathan agrees. He adds, a little wistfully. “Looks like they’re having fun though. Must be nice to fly.”

She laughs. “When you were a kid, did you run around with a cape on by any chance?”

He shakes his head, grinning. “Duke’n me used to-.”

A little boy runs into Nathan as they’re passing Joe’s. Nathan catches him carefully and smiles. “Hey Davey. You’ve gotten taller since the last time I saw you.”

“I know! I’m even bigger than Jenny now.”

 _Sister_ , Nathan mouths. 

The boy goes on. “I wished it every day and now it’s true.” He runs off back to his mother.

Audrey looks at Nathan. “Tell me it’s not that simple?”

“What?”

She looks at the cafe where, before their eyes, a mountain of chocolate ice-cream appears before a little girl small enough to be overshadowed by it. 

Audrey counts them off on her fingers. “There was a guy this morning running late to work, and all the clocks slowed down on his route. Somebody got to come back from the boat early today because the fish swam right into the nets. A couple of bored little kids were waiting around outside the Gull and a shoal of mermaids appeared to give them a show. You wanna bet someone on Evans Street wanted a snowday?” 

“And David?”

“Wanted to be taller than his big sister. Wished it, actually.”

Nathan blinks and stumbles over his feet. 

“Nathan!” Audrey grabs his hand and this time it’s not just her touch he startles at. 

He bounces on his feet and then, eyes wide, reaches out to trail his hand over the wall. His voice is admirably calm. “Wishes. Yeah, I think you could be right.”

 

* * *

Audrey doesn’t ask Nathan why they’re heading towards Duke’s boat. She could, but she doesn’t. 

When they get there, Nathan calls for Duke, just like this morning, demand and question and something else. Duke is in the doorway, moving almost before Nathan speaks, tripping over himself to get across the deck. He says, nonsensically, “Don’t, okay, just-” and takes hold of Nathan’s arm. 

Nathan gasps, manages a garbled version of Duke’s name, and moves with his whole body to meet Duke in the kiss. He runs his hands through Duke’s hair, slides his legs open so Duke is standing between them. Duke groans, murmurs something that might be Nathan, too caught in the kiss to be intelligible.

Audrey watches them for a minute or two, because while she wouldn’t have called today as the day they got past their issues, she is not complaining. Apparently this is the day for wishes. This can’t be hers, because she’s pretty sure that her immunity works on the useful Troubles as well as the lethal ones. She’s also pretty sure that a wishing Trouble is going to become lethal sooner than they’d like. But she watches for a minute or two anyway. Even before she remembered herself, she saw the way Nathan watched Duke - like someone he should have kissed the moment he saw him, back safe and sound. She wasn’t there for that reunion but she can guess. Nathan showed enough to surprise Duke, but not as much as he was feeling. That’s still true, but a fraction of what he’s feeling right now may be enough.

Duke breaks for air first. “You figured out that it was-.”

“Yeah. How did you- Duke, what the hell did you wish for?”

“You can’t-?” He looks at the deck. “For you to feel me the way... You know? Why, what did you wish for?”

Nathan raises his eyebrow. “To feel, period.”

Duke waves his hand vaguely. “Sure, so yours was better, I wasn’t exactly thinking things through when I realised.”

“How _did_ you realise?”

“I found a bottle of whisky worth more than my whole place behind the bar.”

“And?”

“When you left, before, I wished _really hard_ , for a good drink. That particular drink, in fact, which I haven’t sampled for a decade.”

Nathan asks, “You could wish for anything you want, and you settled on whisky?”

“ _Again_ , not exactly thinking rationally. It’s not like a genie appeared and said ‘what are the three things you want most in the world?’ I wanted whisky, it appeared. I wanted-.”

“To kiss me.”

“Yeah. Well. That was after the whisky.”

“Duke.”

“What?” He looks up at Nathan. “You wished to be able to feel things.”

“Yeah.”

“And then you came here.”

“ _Yeah_.”

Audrey loves the sound of the penny dropping. Delayed as it is. She coughs. “Well, that took longer than it needed to.”

“Audrey.” Duke twists his hands, empty, in the air.

“Hi.”

“That wasn’t-.”

“Am I supposed to be acting surprised right now? Or upset?” The first thing Audrey did when she got all the way back was kiss Nathan. The second thing was to wrap her arms around Duke’s shoulders and press her face against his neck, breathing him in. The third, undoubtedly, would have involved some combination of the two, the same way around or reversed. But they’re always getting interrupted. That would have been the one clear moment and so ever since then they’ve been stuck somewhere between that first kiss and the next step.

“No?” Duke says.

“Good.” She turns. Speaking of interruptions. “Nathan-.”

He doesn’t make her say it. “This isn’t going to last,” he says. “The wishing.”

“The car didn’t,” she agrees. “Plus...”

“This is Haven,” Duke says. “Someone’s going to wish for something deadly any minute now. Still-.”

“What?”

“You think we’re close enough to whoever it is for another wish to work?”

Nathan tilts his head. “What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking that wishes come in threes. I’ve had two, you’ve had-?”

“Two, I think.” When Audrey looks at him he adds, “I’m pretty sure I freed up the car parking space earlier.”

“And you gave me grief over whisky?” Duke asks. “Anyway – one left each.” He taps Audrey’s arm. “So what do you want?”

“Me?”

He nods. “I think we take advantage while we’ve got it. We deserve that.”

She shakes her head. “The things I... wishing won’t fix that.” What she wants most is answers, and that doesn’t seem like something a wish is going to be able to provide. As for the other things...

Nathan says, “If I wish for an end to the Troubles, you might disappear again. Or forget who you are again. I wish that you don’t have to leave, the whole town could fall apart.”

“Exactly,” she says.

Duke looks pointedly at Nathan. “Not like that stopped you last time. Why can’t we just try being specific? We're smart people, we should be able to work this out.”

“Even if we could,” Audrey says, “it won’t hold. The clocks started again eventually. And if it did... we need to stop the Trouble. Whoever's doing this, they can't be doing it on purpose. No one's asking for their wishes, they're just coming true. And that means-.”

“They could ask for anything,” Duke says. “Even if they don’t really mean it, it’ll come true anyway.”

“Yeah.”

Duke reaches out and takes her hand. “Still.”

“Still what?”

“So we don’t ask for a big deal thing. I got an excellent bottle of whisky out of this, there’s nothing you want?”

Nathan smiles at her. “Yeah. Share and share alike, Parker. What can we do for you?”

She says, “I wouldn’t mind-.”

“What?”

“You know that bad wish someone’s about to make?”

“Yeah.”

“If they could wait an hour or two, that’d be nice.”

“That’s all you want?” Duke asks. “An hour with no crisis?”

“An hour with no crisis.” She grins. “My guys, and a boat. Why, what else would I do with three wishes?”

Duke smiles back at her, secretive and something like nervous. Nathan presses his hand to the back of Duke’s neck.

And then the phone rings.

Audrey answers. “Parker. On our way.” She hangs up. “Too slow, sorry boys.”

 

* * *

The house is split in two. The first responders assure the three of them that no one was hurt, no one is still inside. They’re taking the woman to hospital to check her out, but she was conscious and talking. 

Audrey recognises the other woman – the one standing on the sidelines watching the ambulance leave. “Hello? Miss?”

She startles, but doesn’t run.

“It’s Ellen, isn’t it? We saw you this morning.”

“Yes.”

“And you were at the Gull earlier, Duke said you stopped by to pick something up?”

“Yes.” She nods. “I didn’t- I don’t know how to stop it.”

Nathan walks up beside Audrey, and Duke comes to flank her. Nathan asks, “How did you find out?”

“When I was at the centre. Some of the kids there- kids want stuff, but that’s nothing new. It was just small things, at first. People would find things they’d been looking for, or the children would show up with toys no one remembered bringing in. Except then there was this boy, he and his father had a fight. Tommy told his Dad something and it didn’t- it didn’t go well. He came to the centre to get away from it, and he was talking to me. Then he was- and his dad came in, crying, apologised to him and took him back home.”

“But it wore off,” Audrey says. “His father doesn’t remember making up with him?”

Ellen says, “It doesn’t last. They’re actually- he doesn’t remember apologising, but he didn’t throw Tommy out again. It worked, a little. But the other things- this morning, my neighbour. She thought she was pregnant. She’s been trying for so- It doesn’t last that long. It used to work for longer, but now...” Her eyes are wet.

“Lots of wishes,” Audrey says. “Everybody wants something, don’t they? And the more they want, the less time it lasts. And you-.”

“I want to help them.”

“You do help them. You help out at the centre; you look out for those kids. You try to make things right for them. But what they’re doing now-.”

“He wanted to take half the house,” she says. “And it split in two.”

Audrey sighs. “That’s- Haven has a way of turning things like that.”

“I don’t know how to stop this.”

Nathan says, “I think I do.”

“Nathan,” Duke says. 

“I’ve seen the movie too. That wish should hold, right? If I wish for her Trouble to go away.”

Audrey takes his hand. “We know it’s possible. Troubles can be ended.” She doesn’t look at Duke. “But you-.”

Nathan says, “The next thing is going to be someone wishing someone else dead. And I don’t know if that’ll take or not, but I don’t want to risk it.” He looks at Ellen. “I’m gonna use my last wish for you, okay?”

She nods, tears spilling down her cheeks. “I just wanted to help people.”

“I know you did.” Nathan closes his eyes. 

Audrey feels Duke’s arm slide across her back, letting him settle his hand on Nathan’s elbow. She holds her breath.

Nathan opens his eyes and Ellen asks. “Did it work?”

Nathan frowns. He calls, “Stan?”

Stan is standing on the edges of the scene. “Yeah, Chief?”

“Make a wish for something, would you?”

“Sorry?”

“Coffee, maybe?”

“I could go for a coffee, sure.” They all stare at his hand. Nothing happens.

Nathan waves him away. “Look like it worked.”

Audrey asks, “But you can still...?”

He nods. “Right now, yeah.” Nathan shakes his head. “Okay, let’s get this tied up. Paperwork.”

 

* * *

Duke gave them until five before he came to stand inside the doorway of Nathan’s office to glare. “You’re making me loiter in a police station.”

“You don’t actually have to...”

Duke crosses the room in two strides. “Now.” He stops. “Nathan?” He reaches over and taps the back of Nathan’s hand, resting on the pile of uncompleted paperwork.

Nathan jolts and looks up at him. “I’m nearly finished.”

Audrey stands up. “Well, we’ll be on the boat when you’re done.” She tucks her hand into the crook of Duke’s arm and allows him to walk her out. 

Duke grumbles the whole way back to the boat, mostly non-specific complaints about Nathan’s particular brand of conscientious. “-seriously, like the paperwork won’t be around tomorrow.”

“So will you,” Audrey reminds him. “And so will I.”

Duke leans on the rail of the boat. “You ever look at him, when you touch him?”

“Sure. And I look at him around you.”

“It’s not the same.”

“No, because you two are... honestly, I’m still not sure what’s going on with the two of you. But he missed you when you were gone, and the first thing he did when he realised he could feel again was head here. You pretty much wished for each other – doesn’t mean you wouldn’t have got there eventually on your own, Trouble or no Trouble.”

Duke slides nearer to her, tight against her side. “I missed you when you were gone too.”

“When I’m not around,” Audrey says, “the two of you forget the important stuff.” She grins. “You miss my smarts.” Duke looks as though he’s going to argue that point, so she cups his cheek with her hand and kisses him first. His hands fall to her waist, holding her secure to push up and deepen the kiss. She steers them over to the bench, which is easily big enough to accommodate them both side by side, but still ends with her a little on top of him. 

When Nathan gets there he stands and looks. Audrey rolls sideways so Duke can sit up and grab Nathan’s hand.

Nathan pulls back, forcing Duke to stand up. “Duke. _Duke_.”

“What?”

“I’m still going to want to kiss you if this wears off.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” He pulls Duke closer. “You know, I didn’t mind the other parts, the parts we could have been having this whole time.” He smiles. “You moaning my name, for example, that worked pretty well for me.”

“Asshole.”

“Also the thing you did when I pulled your hair.”

Duke shoves him onto the chair. Audrey shifts to make room for them both, tangled up arms and legs and skin pressed warm together.

Nathan nods. “That too. Bet it still works fine when I’m back to normal.” He rearranges them so he has his arm under Duke’s neck, ducking in for a second to kiss the side of Duke’s head.

Duke takes a breath. “Good.”

“So, could you stop trying to pull my arm off dragging me into bed with you? Not that I’m objecting to the idea, but if you’re not going to be interested when this goes away...”

“That’s not it,” Duke says. “I’m just saying, we could have maybe left Haven to its own wish-making devices for a week or two. What’s the worst that could have happened?”

Audrey stares at him. “Seriously?”

Nathan laughs. He runs his hand up Duke’s arm and exhales. “Plus, if it lasted a whole week, I might not have had the willpower left to wish it gone.”

Duke turns around. “You would have,” he says. "You're too damn good not to. But I think we've got an hour or two, if nothing else.”

“Yeah?”

Duke looks between them. “I had one wish left, remember? And Audrey was pretty clear on what she wanted.”

Audrey pulls them both in. “My guys, an otherwise empty boat, no interruptions.”

“You think there was wish enough left for that?” Nathan asks.

“Yeah,” Audrey says. “I think so.” Wanting isn’t always enough, but there are worse places to start. “Still, if it wears off, it wears off. I figure we’ll be able to take it from there.”

**Author's Note:**

> Note: Reference to infertility of an offscreen OC.
> 
> Title from Aladdin - Friend Like Me, because apparently I couldn't help myself.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Podfic of] What Will Your Pleasure Be](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9277451) by [knight_tracer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/knight_tracer/pseuds/knight_tracer)




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